Parenting 101

Bahb and Fu2rman,

I have been reading you guys for about a month or so,
I think you guys are great.

I want to take you up on the offer to give me some
advice.  I'm going fuckin' crazy with my wife and my
10 year old!  He plays in this stupid soccer league my
wife found, they don't even keep score, they cheer for
both teams, it's only about having fun, everyone is a
winner, it's insanity.  I'm trying to teach my boy how
to be a man, compete, win, sometimes lose, but deal
with it like a man!  You win some you lose some, but
you learn from every loss, and then you go out and win
more than you lose.

I keep trying to explain this to my wife, but she
fights me tooth and nail, she says it's good for his
self esteem.  I can't figure out how.

Guys, help me out here, what am I supposed to do!

Steve Kxxxx
Portland OR





This was emailed this evening to

fu2rman@yahoo.com

you can get advice from Fu2r and Bahb too...


Steve,

My heart goes out to you.

I didn't know this stuff was real.  I hoped it was an urban legend.

OK, have you always lived in that damn tree huggin' Portland?

That would be your first mistake.

Second mistake, why would you leave your seed in such a nutjob?

What did you expect from her?

I hope you don't have any girls, or she is going to have your
daughter on the pill by the time she is 11, you know what that leads to.

Now, if this is the case, have her call the Fu2rman once 
she is 18.  Girls like that turn out so nasty.

But back to my point.  You gotta get this woman of yours in line.

You sound like a mans man, although you can't convince your wife
that she is going against human nature, which she is, and you
allow your boy to continue to be emasculated, so I have my
doubts about you.

Here's the deal.

Number 1.  It's about saving your boy, get him the hell out of
that league, I don't care if he cries, kicks, screams, whatever!

He does not go back!

Number 2.  Soccer is Europe, South America, and who cares!
It's as important as Hockey!  The frickin' concept is the
same, one on ice, one on grass, 2 goals, kick or slap a
puck or ball into said goal.  Blah blah blah.....

The boy needs a SPORT!  

Baseball if he's smart and coordinated,
Basketball if he is coordinated and has some height in his genes, 
Football has a place for anything else!

Think about it Steve, Portland, The Trailblazers gotta still be trying to
save the reputation that The Jail-Blazer gave them!

They gotta still be doing community service, therefore,

doing camps for kids.

Get your boy around some NBA guys.

It will shake that little wussy non-competitive BS out of
his system.

Then get him away from them, those guys are idiots!
Bunch of spoiled babies.

But they do like to win.

You gotta start somewhere, just remember, there is no final fix.

These damn kids are a constant work in progress.

That's why I never got one!

Bahb, anything to add?